Thursday, February 24, 2005

Who are you?

I'm in the office again. and my boss still ain't back. He won't be back till Monday, so here I sit with Launchcast in my ears and the whole Internet in front of me. Well. The Internet gets boring after a while. After all, unlike some people I know, I am not into porn. Ick.

Let's introspect for a while, and look at selves. Who are you?

If someone were to come up to you and ask, 'Who are you?', how would you answer? You could answer in the singles ad format; Asian female, 137 lbs, 5'6, 34-27-33, tan, brown/brown-black (eye/hair colour). But are your physcial attributes who you are? In our body-conscious society, it sometimes seems so. Men are judged by their bone structure, musculature, size (of various body parts), and so on. Women are judged by our attractiveness, sensuality, boob-waist-hip measurements, hair colour, skin colour/texture, weight, the list is endless. But is that who we are? If that is all I am, I think I shall proceed to be depressed. Our physical bodies are nowhere close to embodying who we are. No pun intended. The description above could describe anyone of the 2 million-odd women who live in our country. Gosh. So much for standing out from the crowd.

What about our intellect? We are all intelligent beings (the intelligent part is doubtful sometimes) , and are capable of reasoning, making rational decisions, logic. Some are better at it than others, but we all are capable of learning at least. But animals also learn. Unconsciously, yes, but it is learning still the same. They are hardly as dumb as you might think.

If not physicality, then what else is there? Personality, perhaps? Personality is 'The pattern of collective character, behavioral, temperamental, emotional, and mental traits of a person.' All of our personalities are unique. No two people react to an event exactly the same way, talk in the same way, even break down in the same way. Psychology has broken up personality into categories and sub-categories, but ultimately these categories are not etched in stone. They cover a range of traits that may appear in varying degrees in different people. For example, a person who scores an 8/10 and a person who scores 10/10 under extraversion are both considered extraverts. The person with the lower score is not as extraverted as the one with the high score, but they will be treated simliarly in a psychological setting. As such, you can see that a person's personality is thus unique to him/her. Everyone is different.

But is personality all we are? Some argue, yes, personality makes a man. To an extent, it may be so. The way we react to the people around us, the way we walk, talk, present ourselves, behave. All these are unique to you. But then, am I simply a bundle of reactions? Does that not make me simply an automaton, without thought, just reaction?

Psychology contends that we have no soul. The reductionist versions of the self is that we are simply a bundle of learned reactions and nothing else. Then does that not simply reduce me to an amoeba? Coz that's what an amoeba does. I don't think I wanna be an amoeba. Neither do you. One cell. Boo.

Do we have a soul? I think we do. It's what keeps us alive, keeps us human, gives you a sense of self. Your soul makes you who you are. The soul incorporates a person's intellect, personality. It is what gives us drive and motivation, ambition and will. If we have no soul, then we are no better than the amoeba.

The state of the soul is reflected in the person that we are, our behaviour and emotion. If our soul and spirit are in tune with God and what God be wanting us to do, then it can be seen in the changed lives of the Christian walking with God. If we are lost, however, that is quite clear as well. The soul is sundered from the spirit, the person is desperate, needy, emotionally warped/dependent on the things of this world. Guilt, depression, a low self-esteem, are all hallmarks of the lost, searching soul.

Thus, the state of the soul is the state of the person. Yes, a facade is possible, but like old paint, it will eventually begin to crack and peel, exposing the decay beneath. Look beyond the faces of your friends, neighbours, family members to the soul beneath. Behavioural issues, depression, dependency, despondence, hysteria, an inability to be alone, self-centeredness, self-mutilation, hatred, jealousy, anger, bitterness, despair, these are all the marks of a soul and a self that is crying out for help. Beyond the facade is the hidden self.

Look for it.

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